Author Archives: Ross | TheFaceBaby

he’s in…

Whoever’s ready to go swimming say “I!”


Whoever’s ready for a snack say “I!”


Whoever’s ready for a nap say “I!”

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiwaiiiiiiit a second …


… iiiiiiii am not!  Yeah, that’s what I was saying.  I am not ready for a nap.

And yeah, maybe I have a s-s-slight stutter.  iiiiiiis that a problem?  Bully!

he’s not following…


…who’s there?

Umm … hello?  

Seriously … is anyone there?


… knock-knock jokes work a whole lot better than this.

he memes on mondays…



he’s committed…

… punch myself in the face?

Seriously?  That’s what you want me to do?

You’re insane.

Onnnnnnn second thought …


… I’ll literally do anything for a cookie.  Pay up!

he’s a bill from the hill…

If your idea of wearing eye shadow is asking a cow to kick you in the face…


… youuuuuuu might be a redneck!

he’s impatient…


Mum – what the heck?  This is taking

We put that Kool-aid in the freezer, like, TWENTY MINUTES ago …


… is it time for popsicles yet?!

he rubs it in…

What happened to all’a those riots?

I mean, they shouldn’t’ve happened in the first place … but what’s the deal?

Now that it’s Tuesday, losing the World Cup isn’t as big of a deal anymore?

Need I remind you, the Germans were all just yelling …



… gooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaalllllllllllllllllllllll!!!!!!!

Or, I guess they actually yelled “ziiiiieeeeeeeeelllllllllll!!!”  Since, you know — they’re German.

Or maybe it was dunkelmeister.  Or perhaps das boot.  Or … volkswagen?  I have no idea.


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