he feels your pain…
Here’s to you, random woman walking down the street.
Your 4-inch platform flip-flops, fresh spray tan, and pink bedazzled trucker hat have effectively won Bubba’s attention. He is simply in awe of your ability to text with your right hand, hold a blended caramel frap and super-slim cigarette with your left, all while you obnoxiously smack a wad of bubblegum and rock out to your headphones. And yet, somehow, amid all of your impressive multi-tasking, you fail to notice the curb.
Goodbye coordination. Hello face-plant.
It’s a good thing your comedically large sungoggles covered up half your face… it turns out you get to keep the skin on your forehead because of them. Well played, ma’am …well played.